DCC: A Red & Pleasant Funnel through the Terrible Goblin Wood

Session Report:
Sunday kicked off A Red & Pleasant Land using DCC RPG. Four zero level characters per player were generated by the book, and we got rolling.

A pair of children became sick of farm life and decided to run away from their boring village, Centerville. To the village's chagrin, they went toward the Terrible Goblin Wood, and even worse, toward Voivodja, Land of Unreason, Fallen Palace of the Dream Mad King. The communitarian impulse runs strong in Centerville, so its citizens (mostly halfling and human with a dwarf and elf for good measure) headed out on a find and return mission.

The journey was uneventful until the villagers stumbled into a goblin ambush. Bromstahd, the dwarven apothecarist, took a goblin spear to the throat and became the first of the fallen. The rest of the village rallied around the death of their friend and quickly killed four goblins, causing the remainder to flee. Dennell, the halfling dyer covered the dwarven die-er with some cloth with the intention of returning later to give Bromstahd a proper burial. The group then continued on its way.

Dennell led the party onward. Soon, after rolling a one on an orienteering check, the party saw a blue lump ahead on the path. They approached cautiously to find cloth soaked with blood, containing the remains of Bromstahd, who had been partially devoured by animals. Now unnerved and saddened, the brave villagers continued on, this time paying closer attention to their path.

With their new found diligence and determination, the group readily detected another goblin ambush on the path ahead. After carefully sneaking to just before the goblin trap, the turnip farmer Blort bravely charged past the goblin band to draw them out for his compatriots. All but one goblin were slain in short order, most spectacularly with a rock hurled by a sling that entered a goblin eye, and messily exited the back of the goblin's skull. Mirra: halfling, gypsy, gore-inator.

The final goblin was subdued and captured, threatened and interrogated. He claimed to know where the children from the village had wandered, and told the village their likely reason for running away, "You are all a bunch of assholes."

Darkness soon fell and Dunstan the goblin (they never did catch his name, because villagers cum adventurers are assholes) plead with them to make camp for the night. He knew that any misfortune that fell upon the group would be returned upon his head. The group was determined to find their youngsters and insisted on pushing onward.

"But please, no torches!" the nameless goblin cried. "You will attract Baba Naga!"
"Who is Baba Naga?" they all wondered.
"You know Baba Yaga?" asked the goblin.
Mirra the gypsy halfling did.
"Well Baba Yaga is made up, Baba Naga is worse!"

(To be continued...)